Calgon.....take me away......

My daughter is 10 years old....and I want scream. She is having her BFFL staying over and she pitches a fit because I am using my lap top and she wants to use it so they can play a game online.  I told her that I am waiting on an email and it is my lap top so she could wait until I am done. She mouths off and I can just feel my temperature rising. How could her BFFL want to hang around her when she is being a little brat!!!!????? I feel bad for her because her she is sleeping over and my daughter is acting like this. AUGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!

My husband found out tonight that he will be leaving for school on January 17th. He'll be gone for 6-8 weeks, which will be interesting because I will need to figure out what to do with my kids from the time they get out of school around 3:45 til I get off at 5:00.  I know my sister will help out when she can and I am hoping my mom will be able to come and help out. That all depends on the weather too. When he was deployed for months at a time it really wasn't an issue because I worked at home. 

I am so ready for the holidays to be over.  I am tired of seeing cookies and all the other yummy goodness around.  I have never had strong will power and it is so hard.  Between all of that, letting my daughter stress me out, and knowing my husband will be leaving in less than a month I am not feeling the best. I want to sleep and not have to do anything but just sleep and write and read. I would like a dark room, a lamp, my laptop, my books, and a bed.  Sounds depressing huh???? 

I'm trying to stay out of the kitchen........wish me luck!!!!!

RIP Brittany Murphy

A little bit ago I heard that Brittany Murphy passed away!!!! I can't believe that!!!! Cardiac arrest???? She was so young!!!!  I loved her in "Clueless"...and she held her own in "Girl, Interrupted" with Angelina Jolie and Wynona Ryder. My prayers are with her family.

Today was a rough day.....I keep seeing cookies everywhere!!!!! Ugh!!!! This is killing me!!!!  I think I've done a lot better than previous years. I can't NOT eat them....I just can't eat the amount that I used to. ya know??? 

I really miss my best friend, Carrie. She is going through a rough patch, but I know that she'll make it through. She's a strong woman.

I don't have a whole lot else to say. Just wanted to write. Good night all.....

My Chocolate Hell......

This is a cruel time of year for me!!!!! Here I am wanting....needing.....to lose weight and people keep bringing all of this YUMMY TO MY TUMMY  delicioso treats!!!!!  I LOVE CHOCOLATE!!!!! So, what does a customer do.....BRINGS YUMMY BROWNIES TO MY WORK!!!! They are just chewy chocolate.....they taste like they have butterscotch or something in them too!!!!!  Exhibit A is below...and no, I didn't eat all of that. I had 2 small pieces...which together would still equal a smaller piece than I used to eat, so I am proud about that!

HELLLLLLOOOOOO????? Is there a reason my own personal hell has invaded my workspace???? LOL!!!! Then, right at this moment, my husband is making snickerdoodles (YUM!!!!) and these snowball cookies that have a HERSHEY'S KISS baked right in the middle of them!!!!!!  Just saying that reminds me of this dessert that I order at Outback or some other restaurant bad for me.....it that cake that has melted chocolate coming out of it. You know the one I mean....the one where when you go to take a bite and you put your fork in the cake all of this warm melted chocolate runs onto your plate...mmmmmmmmmm.

Ok, enough driving myself insane. I am just making it worse for myself.  I have this wierd habit. When I start craving food, I get out my recipes I've printed off and start writing them in recipe books. This is going to take forever because I have printed off a ton of healthier recipes.  I am addicted to recipes even though I haven't made but 4 or 5 of them. So far my family has liked everything I've made. Well, my son hasn't but he is a picky eater. He refuses to eat fruits and vegetables. He once told me he'd eat a banana, but ONLY ON WEDNESDAYS!!!! LOL!!!!!  So, I've started getting him that V8 fusion. He won't always drink it though. He frustrates me because he won't eat anything unless 1) he knows there isn't a vegetable in/on it, 2) he can dip it in Ranch, ketchup, or mustard.  We'll sit down to dinner and about 10 minutes into it he will say he's full, his head/throat hurts, or he does'nt like whatever is left on his plate. He was my 10 pound baby and now he's probably not even 55 lbs. He'll be 7 in less than a month.  He gets colds easily and I'm wondering if his eating habits have anything to do with that. If he doesn't eat healthy, does that mess up his immune system?

Well, today started out crappy, but it felt good to sit here and write. Writing calms me.  Hope everyone has a good weekend!!!!!



"The higher your energy level, the more efficient your body. The more efficient your body, the better you feel and the more you will use your talent to produce outstanding results." Anthony Robbins

What I intended......

Ok, I intended for this to be a blog following my weight loss journey. Well, that isn't how it's ended up. I read all of these blogs of people, who like me, have the band and their blogs are awesome! I tend to forget I have this blog....so I wonder if I should just stop altogether or make it a point to blog.


Ok....weight loss info. I had an appt last week and got another fill. My doctor said I am ahead of the "norm". What is normal???? Normal is not getting fat to begin with. Right? Normal people don't get over weight and then have surgery to get over it...right??? Wrong! Whose to say I'm not normal? Whose to say that having surgery was the "easy" way out? Is the "easy" way out being scared you're going to vomit when you take too big of a bite....because it's stuck and won't go down? Hell no!!!!! Surgery isn't the easy way out. You can still gain weight with the band. It's a tool, not a cure. It is so irritating that people consider it easy. When I first decided to get the lap band surgery, I didn't want to tell anyone because I didn't want to hear "You can do the same thing with diet and exercise." Not everyone is able to lose weight just by doing that. Now I am doing that in conjuction with my lap band. I need that reminder if I start to eat too much. 

My doctor asked me if I've found my "sweet spot" yet. At that time I hadn't yet, but now when I eat and get the hiccups, that is when I know to stop.  LOL!  I have always hated it when I get the hiccups....so OF COURSE that is my "sweet spot" signal.  Sometimes though I get them early in my meal and I think  "No way am I done!!!!" 

Well, I need to get some other stuff done. I need to also think about if I am going to continue blogging. I need some ideas!!!